There isn't a night where I think about how the stars have changed for both of us. If we're being honest with our pens to paper there are often times that I think about that night as well. What we could have done to change the outcome or what would have happened if I had done more or less. I've done that an awful lot in my life, actually.
What I've learned is that no matter our choices we did what we thought was best at the time. You thought you were doing what was best for your family and to put your best step forward for the people of your kingdom. I know it, deeply and sincerely with every fibre of my heart, that is where your thinking and choices lay.
The unfortunate truth is that Ultima had us on his puppet strings from the very beginning. Pullings and pushing us in whatever way he wished. At the time, we had no way of knowing that it was he who had used Olivier. And in a way, my mother as well.
I know the guilt can be palpable. Yet, please believe me when I write the words that if your father were able to see you now he would see a man who had done his best with what he could to protect his people.
If our fathers could see us now. I think they would hope for us to be better men than them. Not to make up for choices made but to make choices for our own.
And perhaps we have that time now... a break in this indescribable journey of ours, to do just that.
I hope you can at least rest easier with your thoughts, Dion. I think of you often in this regard.
no subject
There isn't a night where I think about how the stars have changed for both of us. If we're being honest with our pens to paper there are often times that I think about that night as well. What we could have done to change the outcome or what would have happened if I had done more or less. I've done that an awful lot in my life, actually.
What I've learned is that no matter our choices we did what we thought was best at the time. You thought you were doing what was best for your family and to put your best step forward for the people of your kingdom. I know it, deeply and sincerely with every fibre of my heart, that is where your thinking and choices lay.
The unfortunate truth is that Ultima had us on his puppet strings from the very beginning. Pullings and pushing us in whatever way he wished. At the time, we had no way of knowing that it was he who had used Olivier. And in a way, my mother as well.
I know the guilt can be palpable. Yet, please believe me when I write the words that if your father were able to see you now he would see a man who had done his best with what he could to protect his people.
If our fathers could see us now. I think they would hope for us to be better men than them. Not to make up for choices made but to make choices for our own.
And perhaps we have that time now... a break in this indescribable journey of ours, to do just that.
I hope you can at least rest easier with your thoughts, Dion. I think of you often in this regard.
Joshua.